Yoda Proverb

I started climbing a few months ago and it's been a lesson in Do or do not, there is no try.

I'm scared of heights, so by the time I'm at the top of a wall, a storm of thoughts is advising me to give up. At first I gave considerable attention to this advice, and it would usually come true: time spent on the wall deliberating or trying to 'motivate' myself fatigues my arms. I've fallen off the wall countless times from a half-assed attempt at reaching the next hold.

At some point I realized I can just kind of ignore the entire thought contraption and fully go for the hold before my (well-meaning) thoughts unfavorably influence reality.

Often when I say I'm "trying", I'm referring to having these thoughts. Trying can turn into sitting uncomfortably in indecision, becoming anxious about this, and entering into further meta-anxiety. Thoughts that confess doubt tend to spawn meta-doubt. With each passing moment, the perceived activation energy required of any possible next move increases - energy gets trapped by indecision.

I guess "trying" is narrative-constructing, while "doing" is reality-constructing. I don't totally understand why sometimes I try, but other times I do, even when in each situation I desire the same outcome. Maybe the cognitive load of 'trying' is subconsciously scaffolding some intent of will that ultimately causes 'doing'.

Empirically, I've noticed:

• When trust outpaces the next thought, the doing happens before the trying needs to happen.
• When I catch myself in a "trying" loop, I have no choice but to ignore my brain and make a decision that isn't the path of least-resistance.